Tracy from Orlando asks:

“Is it OK to immediately ask a guy if he’s looking for a serious relationship?”

Hi Tracy, this is a common question and one which should be or can be filtered as well through most online dating sites.

There are ways to get this type of answer without really asking point blank “Are you looking for a serious relationship?” Some examples of that would be, “So, how would you describe your ideal relationship? When would you like that to happen.”

It is in their answers where you will get a general sense of what their relationship goals are. This is another way to phrase a “serious relationship” question. You can ask very nonchalantly: “What are your relationship goals right now?”

Bear in mind even for people who are interested in a serious long-term relationship, they too may not want to come out and say it. All serious relationships start off casually, with an understanding that if you really like one another, it will lead to exclusivity. Typically when one poses the question up front, and as a matter-of-fact; it almost feels like you’re screening and qualifying by process of elimination & interrogation. This adds some pressure to the dating experience.